Archive for the 'my music' Category

Song: “Closing My Eyes”

Done with my band The Lucies. Woh!! Teenage – or rather, early twenties, angst. There was half an hour at the end of a long recording session so we quickly did this – and kept it, sandpaper throat, microphone pops and all, due to our being out of time and money. It was a staple of the live set, the rest of the band nicknaming the song “One for the ladies” due to its popularity with the girls in the audience.

Shez on bass, Bruce on guitar and overdubbed lead guitar, Andy Cope on moral support.

My heart is telling me lies again. I’m closing my eyes to them.
I’m closing my eyes.
My brain is talking good sense again. It’s advice that I’ll reject again.
I’m closing my eyes.

I feel pretty good inside. I’m gonna try to do it right this time.
Gonna try not to hide.

I know that I don’t know you well, but even so I can tell
that with you I could feel free.
And yet, I cannot speak to you about what I think of you
and what you’ll take from me.

I feel pretty good this time. I’m gonna try to do it right for you.
I’m gonna try not to hide.

My heart is intent on hurting me. My good sense is deserting me.
I’m closing my eyes.
My eyes are always deceiving me, my rationality is leaving me.
So I’m closing my eyes.

Sometimes I think I’m too shy; I’m closing my eyes.

Words / music © Bruce Lawson, all rights reserved

Song: “Kitty Fisher’s Locket”

Kitty Fisher was a lover of Charles I. "Kitty Fisher’s Locket" was an old English folk song that I’d heard of (it was a rude song, as locket was slang for vagina). I never found the original words or tune, so wrote my own. Alison Eglinton sings double-tracked vocals, I play double-tracked guitars and a bit of keyboard.

(Here’s the demo version, recorded on a rainy Sunday afternoon as I was writing it, with me on vocals and double-tracked acoustic guitar:

If Kitty Fisher gives you pictures Make sure that you frame them.
“Here’s one I drew, that man’s you; It’s of heaven when it’s raining.
There’s saint Peter in a mac, he’s got two wings on his back. Do you like it?”

If Kitty Fisher, seeking pleasure talks of making love with you.
Softly kiss her, speak in whispers, watch how she moves under you.
Hold her while she weeps when you both come.
Let the silence in to soothe her.

If Kitty Fisher gives you treasure keep it in your pocket.
Memories in filigree That’s Kitty Fisher’s locket.
“That’s me and my mother when I was a little girl.
Do you think I was pretty?
That’s me in a forest, another time, a different place.
Do you like me?”

Words / music © Bruce Lawson, all rights reserved

Song: “The Libby Purves Megamix!”

A mate of mine, also called Bruce, was interviewed on BBC Radio 4 by Libby Purves the other day, and asked me to burn a CD of the interview. While doing so, I hit upon the idea of splicing up some of the dialogue and making a dance song that had Libby mocking the size of mate’s dick. I don’t usually like dance music (cos it’s piss-easy to make) but I’m rather proud of this!

And, sorry Bruce!

Song: “The Woman Who Weeps”

The tune was written 5 years before the lyrics came together, the title stolen and song inspired by TS Eliot’s La Figlia che Piange. Alison Eglinton sings vocals, I play guitar. It was done in 1 take, except the final 5 bars (which we got wrong), then 1 take for the guitar overdubs.

The woman who weeps has borrowed my life tonight.
I’m failing to keep myself to myself from you.
I watch as you sleep; you breathe untroubled, rhythmically,
and I do not wake you to ask you to hold me.

This woman who weeps could love you if you’d return it,
But feels it weak to lower defences.
this woman could teach you so much if you’d like to learn it.
I wonder why we live such pretences?

The woman who weeps has kicked up the autumn leaves.
This woman you see has seen very few summers through;
this woman who weeps can’t be what she wants to be.
I weep for me. I don’t weep for you.

Words and Music ©Bruce Lawson, all rights reserved.

Song: “From Ocean To Sky”

From Ocean To Sky” was written when I’d been reading a lot on Pythagoras’ discoveries of the mathematics of music and the mathematical foundations of Da Vinci’s paintings. I’ve always wished I could draw or paint. The long outro didn’t work as I’d hoped; the first take had some screaming feedback guitar for the last 45 seconds which the engineer’s son accidentally taped over when he was pissed. Ah well. Vox are Bruce and Alison, quad-tracked harmonies so there’s never a breathing space in the vocal lines; violin by Naomi Cooper. Guitars and keyboards by Bruce.

When we were singing songs
you said, “All music is proportion – rules and numbers.
the words are unimportant, and each one
has the feeling of autumn with its dying fall.
A melancholy sweetness; rules and numbers.

Falling down, I know that everything I see is falling down.
Towers, homes and all your lies are falling down,
to be built up again, twice as beautiful when
they stand, and then they crumble. Falling down.”

Everything to me sometimes seems so real I wish that I could paint you what I see;
shapes and shades and shadows to show you
perfect symmetry.
And in the centre, there’s me, neatly caught between points A and B;
in mathemagical proportions. Rules and numbers.

Words and music © Bruce Lawson, all rights reserved.

Song: “Then You Come Down”

Found another song lurking on a dusty cassette – that never got recorded in a studio because I never managed full lyrics – " Then you Come Down". It was made on a rainy Sunday; the tune came into my head, the scratchpad words while working out the chords, and the demo was made in an hour: headphones on, quickly plug a mic into the Fostex 4-track, point mic at guitar and subsequently at mouth, and you’re done.

The analog 4-track is still a great machine; sure, I’ve got 256 audio tracks at 9 gazillion bits/ second sampling rate on the computer, no tape-hiss, but by the time you’ve got everything set up, you’ve forgotten the song.. The Fotex really is plug-and-play.

Song: “The Song of Laughter and Forgetting”

Alison Eglinton and me on vocals, I play double tracked guitar. there’s a couple (!) of guitar fuckups, but I really like the fade-out.

All of your secrets are pressed between the pages
Of the books you don’t open and nobody reads.
All out of sequence, in cryptic arrangements;
they’re reminders of the memories that you no longer need
but I have seen how the winter is reflected in your eyes.

I will sing a song of laughter for you.
A song of forgetting,
A song to remember me by.

You stand, wrapped in memories while the twilight is filtering
the warmth from the world, and the darkness falls again.
You hide all your feelings, despise them as your weaknesses
when the world seems bewildering, you wear your mask of cold disdain.
I have seen how the winter sometimes darkens your eyes.

I will sing a song of laughter for you.
A song of forgetting,
A song to remember me by.

You look like two children, one golden with spring’s blessings;
the other quiet and frightened by the solitude and dark.
When the world seems unforgiving take my song of forgetting;
there’s no shame in admitting that you’re scared and you’ve been scarred.
I have seen how the summer can be greeted by your smile:

I will sing a song of laughter for you.
A song of forgetting,
A song to remember me by.

A song to remember yourself by.

Words and music, © Bruce Lawson

Song: “Killing Time”

Done with my band The Lucies – our first ever attempt at recording. Shez on bass; Andy Cope on drums, me on guitars and vocals. Mark Ponsford guested on piano. I wrote it about getting to know a girlfriend at the time, and spending ages in conversation through most of a summer but somehow not really managing to say what we felt.

Centre Stage is Julie; in prompt corner’s Bruce.
I say I love you truly but you make a poor excuse.
We’ve listened to your records by the New Kids on the Block.
the conversation’s drying up, the intimacy’s lost -
and what comes next?
Won’t you come round for a little while and we can get together.
Won’t you come round for a little while? We’ll talk about the weather.
Did it rain on your holiday? There were blizzards during mine.
Metrological conversations help to fill the time.

You put on airs and graces and I put on a tape.
you cower in the corner like I’m contemplating rape.
Did you see that programme on the TV last night
about the duck that’s learned to skateboard and the monkey that can write?
So what comes next?

Won’t you come round for a little while when the pub has closed?
Won’t you come round for a little while and we’ll discuss your clothes.
Your brain is made by Gucci, and your breasts are Calvin Klein.
designer label conversations help to kill the time.

We’ve talked of quantum physics and the duality of man
and how you’ll trade your Mini in for a supercharged Trans-Am;
poetry and politics; do you think God is real?
We’ve told each other what we think but never what we feel -
and what comes next?

Won’t you come round for a little while and we can get together.
Won’t you come round for a little while? We’ll talk about ‘forever’,
because I’m looking for a union of body, heart and mind;
we’re killing ourselves slowly when we’re only killing time.

And I’ve got to say, that we must make hay
’cause the sun won’t always shine.

Music / Words copyright © Bruce Lawson

Song: “Gentle My Love”

This song was written on Koh Samui island, Thailand, at the start of the monsoon. It’s supposed to be like a meditation to concentrate on the moment. Alison and Bruce sing vocals, Alan Wrightson wrote and played the sitar part, Bruce plays guitar.

Gentle my love, gentle my love; tonight we’ll admit no tomorrow.
Gentle my love, gentle my love; predict or recall no more sorrow.

Gentle my love, gentle my love; like the sound of the rain as it washes and cleans.
Gentle my love, gentle my love; like the murmur of sea that claims everything;

But if we were to ride on the surge of a wave
We would never sink or drown.

Gentle my love, gentle my love; Don’t hope for, or fear, all that follows.
Gentle my love, gentle my love; tonight there will be no tomorrow.

Words / music ©Bruce Lawson

Song: “Silka, Wearing Fancy Dress”

Done with my band The Lucies. My ex and I had both been sitting there sadly having yet another end-of-romance post-mortem, and she said ‘When we were “in love”’, making little quote marks with her fingers. And that one hurt; not the love fucked up, but the denial that it had actually been real. What’s the point of hurt if it can’t be transmogrified into bitterness and then made into a song, hey?

Silka walks in those evenings When you feel like you’re still a virgin.
You don’t trust your feelings, Silka’s certain she’s hurting.
She is dressed in lace when she says, “Yes, yes, I will; of course I will, yes” -
But if you feel the need to believe her, remember – Silka’s in fancy dress.

Silka in black satin, her long blonde hair in rich profusion;
Something useless happens, reinforcing stupid illusions.
And after all the sinful applause and your unsatisfying taste of success
Comes the knowledge of the flaws that you hate because they’re yours,
And in walks Silka in fancy dress.

Bejewelled in a shattered promise, she’s wearing fading fraying denim.
You’re pierced by inverted commas
that have appeared round the tales she’s been telling you for so long.
She’ll decree: “Everybody loves me”, but it’s too late for you’ve already guessed
Underneath there’s nothing that’s real to see; Silka’s only fancy dress.
Really, she’s merely fancy dress.
She’s very nearly Silka, wearing fancy dress.