Ten reasons why England is great
It’s a tricky thing to say, because the English flag, St George’s Day and patriotism generally has long been hijacked by moron right-wingers, but isn’t England great?
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Shakespeare
Fittingly, his birthday is the same day as St George’s day, as he contributed so much to the richness of the English language - as well as doing his propaganda bit for unity under the Tudors by blackening the name of the last Plantagenet monarch and promoting feelings of English patriotism.
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London
Ah, London. Galleries. Theatres. Ethnic enclaves. Parliament and Big Ben, tourist traps, and carnivals; the Tube; Black taxis and red buses; medieval streets and hideous 1960s brutalist developments. Finest city in the World (if you don’t have to live there!)
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the English countryside
The English countryside is gorgeous. Across the Vale of Evesham in the spring, the beauty of the Yorkshire Moors, the Lake District, the Cornish coast, the Severn Valley in autumn, we don’t have towering mountains, glaciers, or rift valleys. The English countryside is varied, but moderate and dependable. Just like English people are.
Even the animals that populate our countryside are the same. You don’t get malaria from our bugs. We have no poisonous spiders, and no large animals which can eat you. Our single venomous snake - the Adder - is only as nasty as a wasp sting (and I’ve never seen one, ever).
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The Beatles, Stones, Sex Pistols and The Clash
For a small country, we’ve produced a lot of world-changing music. We rock. Nothing more to say.
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Broadway, Henley
They’re chocolate box-perfect English towns. They’re a bugger to live in, as you can’t put a nail in the wall without someone from the local Council making sure you’re not damaging the character of the area, but they’re damn gorgeous. There are houses in Henley that are older than many countries.
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Pubs and proper beer
Pubs - not bars. They don’t need to be all thatched roof or horsebrasses. They don’t need to be picturesque, but do need to be authentic rather than brewery-mandated “English Pub Experience”. They need a sense of community, a character behind the bar, some grumpy regular drinkers, proper beer and probably a resident dog.
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Food
People think English food is just fish and chips or curry - and there’s nothing wrong with either of those. But real English food can’t be beaten, and is rarely encountered by visitors. Take great cuts of meat, fresh vegetables like parsnips, sprouts, roast them all and lightly season, serve with a rich gravy and a pint of proper beer and you’ve got the best Sunday family meal in the world.
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World War 2
We English bang on about the war a bit, it’s true - but it’s because it’s deeply embedded in our psyche. OK, it was sixty years ago, but the reason it stays there is because, for a couple of years until the yanks could be arsed to help out, England and our Gaelic cousins Scotland, Ireland, Wales stood alone: we mobilised our entire workforce, turned civilian factories to making armaments, ploughed up parks to grow food on, and tore down metal railings as raw material to make guns.
We evacuated our children, split up our families and sacrificed our men, while the rest of the world sat on their hands or laid down their arms, because fascism so repelled us. And why shouldn’t we be proud of that?
Jan 2 2007: It’s been pointed out to me that I may not know my history, and the UK may not have stood alone in quite the way I wrote. So don’t listen to what I say…
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The National Health Service
I’m always astonished when I read that in other, allegedly civilised countries, health care is based on ability to pay. God knows, our NHS isn’t perfect, but get this: if you fall sick in the UK you will get treatment of the highest possible quality that the NHS can provide, free at the point of delivery, regardless of whether you’re a millionaire or a vagrant. Now that’s a civilised idea.
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Jane Austen and George Orwell
Both used the English language perfectly to celebrate and satirise the England that they loved. Orwell, in particular, is a hero of mine with his fierce promotion of clarity of language, his love of fairness and his defence of the weak. I reckon he should be the eponymous St George today.
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English people
I’ve a mix of Scottish and English extraction with a dash of Italian too. My wife is a naturalised Brit, from Thailand, so my kids are utter mongrels, which is itself quintessentially English. Everybody is mixed race here.
We live next door to Naz, a British-born muslim of Pakistani background, and our other neighbours are the Murphys, of Irish descent. Across the road are the Singhs and the Cohens and the Smiths. It’s a crappy grubby urban English proper street, full of proper English people.
Hurray for England. Have a good St George’s day.
Hurrah for St George’s day indeed.
Pubs - What makes a pub a pub is the smell. …sweat, stale beer, peanuts. Mmmm.
WW2 - difficult to forget this massive event when everywhere you go there are memorials to the brave people who sacrificed themselves so we can have the life we lead now. Also it’s no uncommon to find buildings left as lasting reminders - take St Andrew’s in Plymouth for example.
April 23rd, 2007 at 11:28 am
Heh, one of the terms coined by Shakespeare listed in that link is “accessible”.
April 23rd, 2007 at 1:16 pm
Amen to the NHS. It’s really hard to imagine living in a country without one.
April 23rd, 2007 at 7:03 pm
Great minds think alike! (We’ll ignore the corollary about fools…).
I was just trying to decide what to put for my St George’s day post when I came across your ‘ten things I like’ concept.
So here’s my 10 Things For England And St George.
April 24th, 2007 at 12:01 am
Sometimes people make their point, throw their teddies, wag their finger….. shout the odds. You chose to emphasise your view with a beautiful overview of the soul of England.
You have made this sceptic isle sound like I actually want to live here. Bruce, you are indeed a poet. My forelock is indeed caressed in adoration for such a review.
(The duck thing was a mistake though!!!!!)
April 24th, 2007 at 12:13 am
Happy St George’s - may your pint never be empty.
April 24th, 2007 at 7:19 am
Jack - I like your list, especially the point about the English love of fair play, which I commented on.
Isolani - with your ZX Spectrum collection and your Win2K Lifebook challenge you exemplify that other marvellous facet of England - the eccentric/ garden shed inventor. (This is a compliment, by the way.)
April 24th, 2007 at 9:08 am
Amen to the NHS. It makes a huge contribution to equality and fairness.
In Belgium we have a state health insurance system which re-imburses at set rates. Middle income people think it’s fantastic, and get truly excellent and rapid healthcare. But when you have a problem finding GBP 15 to take your kid to the GP (you have to pay up front and get partly refunded after), you’d really want to be in England.
April 26th, 2007 at 10:18 am
Love your list Bruce - reminds me of why, although always yearning to be elsewhere, at the end of the day this is a cracking place to live - as long as your local isn’t an All Bar 1 or some other crap ‘cool’ bar.
April 26th, 2007 at 10:01 pm
Just when I needed reminding why I love England so much, I pass your wonderful page… Thanks Bruce! Miss you and the family every single day. Tons of love Pipx
May 9th, 2007 at 12:36 pm
Nice list, but come on — how can anyone be proud of a war with a death toll of over 50 million people???
June 13th, 2007 at 5:11 am
What would have been the alternative, Lars? Appeasement, and allow the germans to kill everyone?
June 13th, 2007 at 12:24 pm
You may passibly pass yourself off as English (though I think the term Briton would be more accurate) but your kids aren’t. I am not being horrible but merely stating a fact.
Thais are Thais. They aren’t Britons and they certainly aren’t English Britons.
October 16th, 2007 at 7:14 am
Bollocks to that Steven. My kids are English, even though they’ve grown up entirely in Belgium, attended Belgian schools and have Belgian mates. That’s not because they have English forebears through many generations, but because identity is constructed (and continually reconstructed) not determined by blood.
October 16th, 2007 at 8:01 am
Steven, what’s the difference between “English” and “Briton” (that is, why do you think I’m one and not the other)?
October 16th, 2007 at 8:54 am
I never said there was a difference. Personally, I’ve always defined myself as a Briton. I don’t approve of loony-lefties saying everyone in the world is British when they patently aren’t. This is why we have Islamic extremism in our country with innocent members of the public blown-up on the Tube. It is high time we stopped immigration otherwise we will become a dispised minority in our own land.
October 29th, 2007 at 9:16 pm
It’s all been downhill since we let those damn Saxons in from Germany. Send the Anglo-Saxons back to the Continent, keep Britain for the Celts!
October 30th, 2007 at 11:52 pm
No one makes comedy or even laughs like the English.
December 15th, 2007 at 7:38 pm
Excuse me?
England and our Gaelic cousins Scotland, Ireland, Wales stood alone ???
I wonder then, how did Australia and New Zealand lose over 40000 soldiers in this conflict?
Lest we forget.
January 1st, 2008 at 12:19 am
Not to mention the Canadians, Indians, Gurkhas, Poles, South Africans etc. who fought the Germans in North Africa and the Middle East. Often armed with American tanks and equipment too.
I do wonder, if European fascism so repelled us, how come Franco stayed in power for so long.
Anyway, at this time of year spare a thought for the 80,000+ US soldiers killed fighting the Nazis in the Ardennes at xmas 1944.
The bulldog spirit got us through the Blitz, but I do think the English view of the war tends to denigrate the contributions of everyone who fought.
January 1st, 2008 at 3:56 pm
Brenda, Jim, I stand corrected; article amended above.
Bloody smartarses.
January 2nd, 2008 at 10:40 pm
Better than being a dumbarse. LOL Thanks for the amendment…..Good man, even.
January 3rd, 2008 at 8:24 am
Oops, that 80,000 in my comment should actually be 20,000. My bad.
Feel free to pour scorn on the Vichy French, by the way. They defended Lebanon and Syria like lions, fighting against us (and the Aussies). Fought valiantly, then bravely refused to join the Free French after they surrendered in 1941. If only they’d remembered how to fight like that a year earlier, thus saving the rest of us a lot of trouble liberating them.
January 3rd, 2008 at 2:12 pm
Bruce, sorry, your kids aint english and i should know, i fought in the war and trust me. The french aint worth shit in my book. there all cowards and the yankees aint any better. please, vote for the BNP. My great grandson is starting colledge, he wants to be a plumber ( great british job ) but , polish people have most of the plumbing industry, and any other industry really. Bring england back to its good old days. where men could wave a england flag without hispanics gunning them down, and they could make a comment on other cultures without being arrested, and we didnt have to wait for ever for some god-damn foriner in asda try to count our money , then short change us. Long Live the queen.
February 6th, 2008 at 11:25 pm
Hell yeah colin, The french are pricks, The yankees are all overweight and the god damned polish are invade britain and takeing all our jobs
February 6th, 2008 at 11:30 pm
They think they can come over to our contry and take our jobs and eat our food. Hell no, The time will come where they will all just mysteriously dissappear.
February 6th, 2008 at 11:32 pm
Colin, you say that my kids “aint english and i should know, i fought in the war.”
Which side did you fight on? From the views you express, you were on the losing side.
(As a matter of interest, I don’t remember reading about the incident of hispanics gunning down men waving an England flag. Can you enlighten me?)
February 7th, 2008 at 12:50 pm
Ironic to see such enlightened attitudes, really, considering that the Poles fought in the Battle of Britain to keep narrow-minded racists from invading England in 1940. Mind you, before that people like Colin would have been complaining about Paddies (like my grandad) coming over and taking all the building jobs, to be sure.
Here’s a moving video about people who are frightened by a world in which not everyone is exactly like them.
February 8th, 2008 at 12:17 am
I’m sorry but being English is being English. The pakis and others that come over to our country are NOT English. They don’t give a shit about this country and are taking it downhill. Vote BNP! And get this country back to the way it is meant to be. I may sound racist but nowadays everything is, including wanting the best for your country. Long live England and Britain.
March 7th, 2008 at 11:52 pm
So, Ja, are you saying that everyone who comes to this country is “taking it downhill”? And for how long has this been taking place? Did the French Hugenots take it downhill? Did the Normans? The Vikings, Jutes, Danes and Saxons?
And I’d be interested to know how this country is “meant to be”. How do you see your homogenous, white England?
March 8th, 2008 at 9:21 am
my goodness, what a terrible country! we welcome with open arms those from less developed places and help them (and their families) live a better life; we tolerate free speech - including words spoken by those who would condemn people from other races or people who have a parent from another race; we have a health care service that treats the sick; we have a library service that feeds the mind for free; we have an education system that strives to eradicate inequality on the grounds of opportunity … Those of you who complain, have you ever lived abroad? do you know what it’s like in much of the world? Please, feel free to move to find your nirvana; just let the rest of us get on with appreciating how much we have to celebrate.
March 11th, 2008 at 4:54 pm
Funny how you guys can rave about WWII and foreigners in your country all together in one melting pot. Is there any connection the world around you is not aware of? Or are you focused on the past, not realizing that we have severe other problems?
Anyway: it pisses me off to see how degenerated the discussion is (I do really mean the people discussing) and my strong suggestion is: use the short time when your economy is up to focus on the betterment of your own future.
Kindest regards to all the retarded 50′es minds
Funny
March 30th, 2008 at 12:39 am
what are you talking about? the words are English, but I’m having difficulty synthesising a meaning.
March 30th, 2008 at 9:47 am
couldn’t agree more - especially with the last one.
April 23rd, 2008 at 9:54 am
As per usual I’m made to feel ashamed of wanting to celebrate all that is good about England and Englishness by the small minded minority who want to align it with Fascism and the BNP.
I’ll ignore the ignorant pricks above and celebrate today in the same way that the Irish celebrate St Patrick’s day - with a smile and a few pints with the melting pot that is my local pub.
April 23rd, 2008 at 2:10 pm
Hear hear! That’s where I’m going now.
Cheers!
April 23rd, 2008 at 7:23 pm
I am not white or English, but I love England! Never have I felt so great in a white country being a foreigner!
Long Live England!!
June 6th, 2008 at 5:37 am
PS But mainland Europe sucks. Fascists.
June 6th, 2008 at 5:39 am
bruce, your kids are definately english!
if they were born or raised in england, they are english. i myself have french, german irish (and obvs english) ancestors - but im still 100% english!
great country!!
July 1st, 2008 at 9:12 pm